phantom love

and that’s all you were

a phantom in the dark

a ghost hidden

 

you liked to think of yourself

much more visible

beef up the role

make yourself up as a saint

like your words could save me

save anyone

 

and yet

where were you

when i needed you most

or when i needed your love

or needed YOU

 

conveniently

you were too busy

with other things

better people

better worries

 

and it became a constant

for you to be like this

leaving me alone

making me feel like

my emotions were invalid

or a burden on your perfect world

 

and the day i left

walked out on your black soul

tarnishing the yellow i had been painting the walls with

for so long

i felt no longer haunted

by the loss

of someone who should have been there

but was not

 

because when i now look back on the pictures

you are not crystal clear

like everyone else

 

you are a transparent phantom –

not there

 

never was

 

and never will be.

 

 

 

2 thoughts on “phantom love

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s