pathway for one

unrequited

 

what a word

 

like those three syllables

could sum up the pain

the waves of emotion

the hurt

that come with giving your absolute all to someone

only to have it

thrown back in your face

 

my entire life

i have only known unrequitedness

 

i look at my friends in envy

as they act like having someone return their feelings

or even having another

pining after them

as some kind of joke

an everyday happening

 

we are not all as lucky

 

the pain of it stings too deep

leaving me with a forever memory

five words

YOU ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH

the reality snaps me quick

 

is it possible for a person to be unlovable?

keep waiting

they say

your time will come

but i am tired of waiting

it seems the gods have chosen my path

only made for one

 

and so many think

i have a need to be completed by another

like this sick yearning to be filled

idiots!

 

i do not need to be completed

or filled by another

i can pour petrol into my own mouth thanks

no-

 

i am looking for a complement

someone who can tell me

on nights where i am throwing myself against the walls

and screaming to a hollow sky

and carving my porcelain skin

that IT’S GOING TO BE OKAY

 

i’ve spent so much time alone

that i begin to wonder

if love is a fantasy

misted in doubt

 

and as i watch others

dance on the toes of their beloveds

and shared saliva under a moonlit sky

and stitch pockets to fit inside each other

i break

a million tiny shards on the kitchen floor

thorns growing on dead branches

bitterness rotting the core

 

and i silently hope

the lovers will cut their feet

on their way out.

 

 

2 thoughts on “pathway for one

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s